25

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So maybe I just got a teeny bit too excited....

So as you know, I'm in college. (surprise! :P)

Well, I just counted how many days left and here are my annual semester stats.

Tests-1
Quizzes-2
Final portfolios-2
Group project presentations-1
printmaking prints- 1 suicide woodcut. {that's literally what it's called..... I started today... wish me luck}
class days- 6!!!!
photo shoots- 2 (crosses fingers that's all)
Rolls of film to develop- 5-6
Scantrons to buy-2
Blue books to buy-1
prints to develop- not a clue
men I have to find to go to the institute dance with me- 1 (.....?)

Alright, so I'm kind of excited. Hardest semester I've had so far, but to be honest, the finals week this semester is looking rather easy compared to the midterm shenanigans.

Also, did you know that shenanigans is a real word!!?

I'm just praying I pass Space exploration. In class today my professor, who's pretty neat, said that our last class is next tuesday where we will have our final. which means no class next thursday or during finals week. And I kind of showed my excitement a teeny bit to openly..... It's fine.

So after all this excitement with the end of semester I thought about Christmas break.

And realized that maybe I'm not all that excited.

I will be working (hopefully a lot 'cause I kinda need some money these days....)
Every time I go back to work at Harmons, I get more grateful that one day I will never have to do this job again. It's not a bad or hard job, it's just.... Not at all what I would want to do with the rest of my life. I believe in high school jobs, they help motivate kids to get an education.

I will be studying for the hardest and longest and most expensive test of my life. Like at least 2 hours every day. Which basically sounds like the worst thing I can think of to be doing with my time on a "break" from school.

I will not be going to my ward in Logan. :'(. You guys, I adore my ward. My most favorite ward I've been in. Except maybe my ward in washington. I still love those people so dang much. I just love the bishopric and the girls in relief society, and family home evening, and ward activities and just going to church. I just love church. Especially in my ward here. It's lovely.

My bed in logan. It's so comfy and fluffy and full of memory foam mattress cover goodness and warm electric blanket bliss. My bed at home doesn't come close anymore. Maybe I'll try and transport it home?

So, pretty much this break is not going to be like most. I don't have a single fun thing planned for this break. {except hopefully my grandparents will be coming from washington!)

I will now put my plug in for them coming-

PLEASE COME GRANDMA AND GRANDPA!! If you don't come it will be the first time in the history of my nearly 21 years that I haven't seen you for 2 christmases IN A ROW! This would be a tragedy. And your grandkids {who ALL live in Utah} will be severely saddened by this.

If anyone has something planned for new years eve, I'd sincerely love to know. Because I don't want to be lame this year like the last 2.

Random tidbit from my life- I've decided that I will be going into the fancy pants paper making business. I'm pretty sure I've paid far too much for all my paper for 19th century and for print making this semester. 1 sheet of mulberry rice paper for printing wood cuts in printmaking is nearly 8 dollars. 8 dollars! That's like 3 rolls of color film! I paid over 20 dollars today for 3 sheets of paper for that class. I really wanted to just print on computer paper but that was frowned upon. I'm pretty sure it doesn't cost even close to even 1 dollar to produce a piece of paper. Rip. Off.

Well, space exploration class is now over. which means my blog post will end because I have something more interesting to do. Like go to the photo lab.

It's my 5/6 birthday today. So maybe I'll make a good dinner tonight of a turkey sandwich and chocolate milk.

Happy end of semester, ya'll.

maybe I'll post some pictures from some of my projects this semester next week sometime.

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And so it begins. The countdown 'till Christmas!

Dear Mr. Santa Claus

I saw this skirt at the mall last week and didn't buy it. It wasn't that expensive either!

most excellent game ever.

My 2 pairs of heels are about 5 years old and have seen better days. I want a pair of simple elegant heels.

sweater tights.

Anything to do with lace.

A thermos. 

Maybe book a few more weddings

This is all.

And this is why I'm thankful for my family

If you haven't ever met my family you're kind of missing out.
We're not very boring. My house is one that gives you good abs from laughing.

Gemma is a delight. You should see her with baby dolls. They're like her best friend. You say Gemma! and she'll look at you and if you're holding a doll, she'll speed crawl to you, grab the doll, and then give it the world's larges open mouth slobber kiss. I'm fairly certain there are few things in this world cuter than this.

my bangs look weird, but Gemma
 looks cute so it makes up for it.

Also, I can't believe how much she looks like Ash did as a baby. Her hair is getting longer and more curly and she looks like she came right out of pictures I've seen of Ash as a baby.

Quinton is still just as strange as usual. Here are some examples-

He goes to try my new coat on {naturally he's shirtless} and I told him he had to put a shirt on first. He said, "I showered yesterday and it's not like my armpit hairs shed that much."  To say the least, he didn't try my coat on.

"Quinton will you pass the honey butter?"-me.  "Right after I kiss you I will!" This happens at least 10 times an hour.

"If there was a giraffe walking down the street would you a-feed him your earrings. b- give him a kiss on the lips. c-call a boy to come rescue you. or D-call ashleigh to give him a ride to the zoo." -Quinton  
{why? Not a clue. I've never seen a Giraffe in the neighborhood.}

Sometimes we have dance parties in the kitchen while cleaning up that usually include more dancing and off key singing than it does cleaning. Especially when 1 direction and the killers are playing.

Kandi, our dog, is scared of Gemma.

Gemma loves Kandi and feeling her fur.

Gemma loves Gangnam Style. I don't think I've ever seen something as hilarious as her watching and dancing and laughing to the music video. She's hypnotized by it. Is she part Korean? Not that I know of.

"Do you wanna feel my six pack?" -Quinton

"Mom, Emilie wishes her boyfriend was hot like me." -Quinton
"I don't even wish I had a boyfriend!" -Emilie
"Okay, fine, Brianna wishes her boyfriend was hot like me." -Q
"Brianna just wishes she had a boyfriend" -E.
thanks siblings.

yes, he does have a winter coat
on with shorts and flip flops.

"Do you want to take a picture of my football pants tan line?"-Quinton


"You are never feeding her macaroni and cheese, hot chocolate, and popcorn again. She threw up last night!" -Ash. (talking about my 9 year old niece Caitlin. I feel like that combination is just fine. Plus, she was the one that wanted that stuff, I was just being the cool aunt......)

"Why are you watching football on mute?"-me
"'cause if mom knows I'm watching football she'll make me help her cook something instead." -Quinton

"Oh no!!! I sent my library book back and it had my math homework and science fair project in it!" -Emilie.

"I've never had a turkey have such a weak back bone!" -Dad. (he had serious issues getting the turkey out of the oven. It kind of broke in half. haha)

It was a low key thanksgiving this year. But that's completely fine. Low key= low stress = way more fun.

And I most certainly love my family.

Also, I made homemade cranberry sauce! YUM!

I'm going to eat pie now. Good luck Black Friday shopping to you!

I'll post my letter to santa tomorrow. :D

My creativity comes at inconvenient times.

Sometimes creativity comes to me at the weirdest times. At 1 am for instance.

I've been running on darn near empty of the creativity fuel tank these days. So even though it's nearly 2 am, I had to run with them.

I just did like 6 design sketches for my print making class and now I'm having a hard time choosing which one to carve into the wood for my suicide print.

Here's the thing about me and sketching: I'm indescribably bad at it. So this is breaking news.

Also, I had a dream last night that inspired a random wedding announcement design that I took off on tonight and am pretty thrilled about actually. Which is so weird. I only design those things usually when friends ask me to.... And I don't even have anything to use it for. Which is a shame because it's pretty fantastically adorable. Quick, someone get engaged!

too bad none of my creativity was in the area I need it in most- Photography.

My best idea for my next project {on sustainability and the color green} has to do with babies sustaining the population growth of the world..... And I feel like it might be a little too stretched for what he wants..... although, I do have a quite adorable niece that is a good model....

IDEA! Maybe I'll photograph people hugging trees!.....

hmmm.

All I know is I'm probably going to need to start pumpin' out the photo ideas here real soon. Ya know, final portfolio due here in a few weeks....

Who wants to model for me?

My take on the feminist movement.

So yesterday, I watched the movie Brave for the first time. Definitely not the greatest animated movie. The discussion there after got me thinking about what I feel about the feminist movement. Not like I get bombarded with it enough at school or anything....

I kind of wish I had some sort of project or essay that I had to write that this topic would fit so I could {'cause I don't have too much free time} research it better and write it more eloquently.

First, the movie. Here's the just-
Girl is a tom boy {totally fine, nothing wrong with it}. She didn't want to act like a princess. Her parents wanted to find her a husband. {kinda creepy 'cause she's like 15.} So these 3 guys come to win her love and they shoot at a target. They're not that good, so she shows them she doesn't need a man and that she's better. {Granted she's 15, but still, it's a movie, and not realistic.} She runs away 'cause she wants to be independent. The men fight each other for her, she turns her mom into a bear, she tells the men she's not interested, mom and daughter make up. They live happily ever after. She probably dies single. {okay, I don't know that.}


I honestly believe that the feminist movement hurts both women and men. Yes, I do believe in equality. That women should be paid the same, have the same rights, etc. But, I also believe that men and women are inherently different. Men are naturally better at things than woman, Women are naturally better at things than men are. This is not a bad thing! It's wonderful that our Father in Heaven created us differently. To bring the best out in each other. To compliment each other.

1 Corintheans 11:11- "Nevertheless, neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the lord."

We're better together. It's a part of the plan. It's not something that needs debate. We're not meant to be competing for who's better and I feel like true feminists don't just want equality, they feel they're superior to men. This is not true. Just the same that men are not superior than women.

I feel like gender roll reversal is confusing people. A lot of people don't agree with gender rolls, and to a point I don't either. Not like they used to be back in the day when woman really were thought to be lesser, but, I think for the most part, this isn't the case anymore. Most men {at least good men} don't think of women as their slaves and puppets.

If a woman wants to have a big career and what not, more power to her. She should be able to choose for herself. I just don't understand why any woman would choose having a career over a family. At the end of the day, how much money you make, what kind of car you drive, how expensive your clothes are, how big your house is will not bring you real joy. It's going to be the relationships you develop in this life- your family, your spouse, your children, your friends.

Yes, you can have both, but at what cost?

Children are said to learn the most of their core values from their home. Not from their school or friends. But, if they don't learn them first in the home, then they will learn them from others. I wouldn't want my children to these things from someone other than me and my husband. If you aren't in the home, and your children are in day care or somewhere else, you don't really have control over what they will learn and be taught is right.

Here are a few quotes from prophets and apostles that I've heard, read, and found.


"Motherhood is near to divinity. It is the highest, holiest service to be assumed by mankind. It places her who honors its holy calling and service next to the angels."

"You [sisters] belong to the great sorority of Saviorhood. You may not hold the priesthood. Men are different, men have to have something given to them to make the saviors of men, but not mothers, not women. You are born with an inherent right, an inherent authority, to be the saviors of human souls. You are co-creators with God of his children. Therefore, it is expected of you by a right divine that you will be the saviors and the regenerating force in the lives of God's children here upon the earth."

--Elder Matthew Cowley

"She is a co-partner with God in bringing His spirit children into the world. What a glorious concept! No greater honor could be given. With this honor comes the tremendous responsibility of living and caring for those children so they might learn their duty as citizens and what they must do to return to their Heavenly Father... A mother has far greater influence on her children than anyone else has, and she must realize that every word she speaks, every act, every response, her attitude, even her appearance and manner of dress, affect the lives of her children and the whole family."

--President N. Eldon Tanner

 "I wonder if we shouted for joy at least in part because of the ennobling stature He gave us in His kingdom. The world won’t tell you that, but the Spirit will."

--Sister Sheri Dew

"You rock a sobbing child without wondering if today’s world is passing you by, because you know you hold tomorrow tightly in your arms."

--Elder Neal A. Maxwell.

"I surely know that there is no role in life more essential and more eternal than that of motherhood."

--Elder Russell M. Ballard

 "There is no greater joy than the joy that comes of happy children in good families."

I  don't think there's any job that would be more rewarding or good that would make it worth it to have the career rather than being a wife and mother.

Here's my final thoughts- I don't want woman to take over the roles of men because I don't want the slots full so men end up having to take over the rolls women used to. I feel like men are becoming more feminine and women are becoming more masculine. I personally just don't agree with it.

I want to marry a manly man, not a feminine man. I want the guy I marry to want me to be feminine, not masculine. To encourage each other to become better people and to work on our talents and what we love.

So, to re-state, I don't think women are lesser than men. I think we're equal, but I know we're also different. That's how we were made. It's a part of the plan. Don't fight against it, embrace it.

I'm happy to be a woman. I'm grateful to have grown up being taught by my parents the values I hold strong too. I'm grateful for wonderful women in my life like my mom and grandmas that have shown me and taught me what I have come to believe for myself.

So many people around me in nearly every area of this University try to make me think that because I'm not a hard core feminist that I'm doing women an injustice.

I kind of feel like I was born to be a Mormon woman during this day and age. Heavenly Father seriously sent me to the right place at the right time. He knows what he's doing.

I know a lot of people have very very strong opinions about the feminist and women's rights movements and I seriously don't mean to cause debate or ruffle feathers, but just to share my opinion and why I believe what I do. This stuff I've just told you about is a pretty big part of myself and what I hope to become.

I just did something I've wanted to do for at least 4 years.

I just bought something I've wanted for about 4-5 years. {that's 1/4 to 1/5 of my life!} A classic black peacoat.

This winter I will finally look like an adult instead of a teenager in a coat that makes me look like a marshmallow dressed in bubble wrap.

I will finally actually look like a woman with a waist rather than a man with a beer belly.

So I do believe that is excellent news.

It was 50% off

and

The best part- because my friend Lindy works at Kohls, she gave me her 15% discount on top of the 20% coupon she gave me.

Did I get this coat for a bargain?

I do believe that the receipt said I saved 145 dollars.

BAM! Now that is what I call Brianna's shopping style.

Here's a picture of the one I bought.

Ask me if I love it. 

Happy Birthday Ashleigh. {awkward pictures and stellar poems}

Hey. Ash.  I made you a post for your birthday!  It's always weird for 2 months when you're 2 years older than me.  No worries, In january I'll catch up to the normal 10 months of the year only being 1 year behind. Although, you being wed and having a child makes you seem a good 5 years older than me. 

All of these are treasures. And they're deep and sophisticated and wonderful and weird. Just like you. :P And here's some really great pictures of you too. {always having a camera really comes in handy for capturing your siblings doing extra weird things.} Too bad I don't have scans of your awkward year pictures. {next year I'll have to put your 4th - 6th grade pictures up.}
Here's the first poem. I found it on the World Wide Web. 

isn't she flexible?

It's your birthday, so don't feel down;
Don't think bad stuff and frown;
Your life should be filled with mirth;
Just look what you've done since your birth.

You started out really small,
Now you're really filled out and tall.
In the beginning you would just cry,
Now you can laugh if you try.

You've done quite well since your start,
So as you grow older take heart;
Keep up the good work and don't be a jerk;
Stay happy till you're an old fart.

merry Christmas! Ashleigh's a reindeer!

here's another one-

Happy birthday young at heart,
So many decades, where to start?
With energy, like that pink bunny,
You make us look lazy, that’s not funny!

Never-ending old school ways,
Filled with stories, to Amaze!
Listening has been lost with age,
You belong on theatre stage.

If you manage to forget,
We’ll remind you, don’t you fret.
Happy birthday young at heart,
Smile with joy, you old fart.

this must be here favorite pose??

and another one-
Today is your birthday, don’t pull your hair,
Look in the mirror, nature was fair.
Not a day over twenty,
I’m kidding! you’re plenty.

Don’t mean to burst your bubble,
But stop asking for trouble.
You know what I mean,
When you drink that caffeine.

What should I bring?
Just give me a ring.
Elephant or Clown?
I knew you would frown.


and another one.-
You are antique,
We need to tweak,
Start with physique,
Let’s make you a geek,
Or just join a clique,
And become sleek,
What do you seek?
A birthday creek,
With sublime mystique,
Surely unique,
I shouldn’t speak,
Quite often critique,
Courageous or meek,
Today is your peak,
Enjoy the week,
And stick out your cheek!

such a model. 

and this ones is really nice too.
I have known you quite a while,
When you talk, you make me smile.
A special friend, I will probably keep,
If you buy me, a cool jeep.

It’s your birthday, I nearly forgot,
Searched online, bought you squat.
Hope you don’t turn all bitter,
Since you’ve never been a quitter.

I nearly quit, writing this verse,
Mind is blank, it’s a curse.
Soon, your party will be here,
If I wake up, I’ll surely appear.
And this one is pretty neat too.
On your Birthday, let’s play a game,
Your rolling eyes, perceive it as lame.
Remember when, you were a child,
Soiled playground days, exceptionally wild.

Dodgeball and horse,
Required some Force!
Unique jump-rope rhymes,
Oh, those were the times.

During Hide and Seek,
We knew you would peek.
When Simon would say to touch your nose,
He did mislead, and you learned to oppose.

Snakes and Ladders would never end,
Near the finish, always descend.
Spin the Bottle during early teens,
What was the brand of your ripped up jeans?

On your Birthday, let’s play a game,
I promise you, it might be lame.
Cheer up and smile, never grow old,
Act like a kid, youthfully bold.

Clever girl.

I'm not sure. sneeze?

HAPPY 22ND, ASHY CAKES! You're a pretty stellar big sis! XOXO

My Boyfriend.

So, here's thee thing. I feel like I've abandoned my blog.

Sorry, It's because I have a boyfriend.

His name-senior year. Nickname-the photo lab. 

We spend all of our time together. But, Currently I'm waiting for midnight to happen so I can register for my last semester before we break up. I can't decide If I'm excited or sad.

But here's a little tidbit of what I do.


Space exploration- I don't ever pay attention. My quiz scores from the semester goes as following-

Quiz 1- C
Quiz 2- C-
Quiz 3- D+
Quiz 4- D
Quiz 5- F+ {it was a 59. F+, right??}


Quiz 6 is on Tuesday. I'll let you know if my score follows the above pattern.

So pretty much this is the best I've ever done in a class. Pretty happy with it..... :P
I'm just hoping I get at least a C- in the class.... Or, I won't graduate in May. Pray for me?

 I literally have never been busier with school than I am now. My priority is my photography stuff.

Working for Aggie Blue print magazine on a few stories right now {shooting for them}
Editing client pictures,
Color film stuff,
19th century processes,
my anthotypes,
 trying to get more weddings and shoots,
 and trying to use what's left of my creative brain that I haven't used yet which is legitimately a problem these days. 

The above mentioned stuff pretty much takes all of my time. Here are a few pictures from it.

Anthotype stuff. {guess what this stuff is! Read below}

paper coated with fruit to make my anthotypes

Green- Spinach. yellow- peach. Light pink- Strawberry. purple- cranberry.

don't even worry, When i'm a mother, I can totally save my husband and I thousands on home-making baby food. I'm totally a pro a purée ing produce. :D

positives to make my anthotypes.

my little set up. and denatured alcohol. Which smells really really nasty when mixed with fruit.
This doesn't make fruity alcohol drinks in case you were wondering. 

All ready to be placed in the sun for 3-6 weeks. {currently on week 4. scared to death the aren't going to work}

19th century set up.

different angle

Mercury vapor lights. they scare me. And they're heavy. If you model in front of them, you have to wear sunscreen because you can get a sunburn. Also, you should wear sunglasses. Seriously, they hurt my eyes!

The result. This is a Albumen print. Used egg whites to make it. NBD.

color film shoot.

Another shoot.

Next item- A LOT of people have been asking me lately about if I'm going on a mission. Especially after conference with the lowering of the girls age to serve. Well, even before this announcement I could have been starting my papers because I turn 21 in January. {January 27, in case you needed to write it on your calendars}. Anyway, I had like the biggest stress out, hard time, with this one earlier in the semester in which I decided and knew {before conference, even} that a mission is not what I'm supposed to be doing at the time being. When conference happened and the new age change and everything that was said during conference brought me even greater peace and confirmation that the answer to my prayers was still right. To some, the message of the prophets was an instantaneous feeling that they should serve, for me, it was something completely different. I'm so grateful for personal revelation.

I think it's SO exciting to hear about all of my girl friends that are putting their papers in and getting their calls already! When I heard the announcement, I was a little jealous. If the age would have been 19 when I was graduating high school, I would have gone. With out a doubt I know I would have. But everything is in the Lord's time frame and it is obvious that this is the time that the world needs more missionaries out there. I'm just not one of them in this way. I have a different mission in store. :D

One of the most important things I've learned this semester-

After all you can do, the Lord will make up the difference.

You guys, He loves me.
And He loves you too.
I just know it.

Anyways, I can't wait to see my family in apx 9 days. :D

Good luck with registering for classes ya'll!

XOXO
-Brianna


P.S. Life is so much better when you take the time to paint your toe-nails. True story. Seriously, take the time to feel pretty and girly. {if you're a girl. Men- please don't paint your toe-nails or try to feel girly. 'Cause that's usually really weird}

I have so much to be grateful for.

I'm pretty sure that when I look back at my college years in the future, I will think of Fall 2012 to be the hardest. 

But, with that being said, I know with out a doubt that I'll probably look at it as the one I saw the hand of the Lord in everything I accomplished as well. 

There are just some things that happen in my life that there's no explanation other than it was the Lord helping me out and making up for all of the ways I fall short. 

I will give you a few that have happened really recently.

I tell you the following not because I want to tell you how great I am, but to sincerely give thanks for the many little {and big} things that I feel humbled for in the last 2 weeks. 

• I tested into stats 2300. This is a story. One that I won't bore you with but I haven't taken a math class since 2008. There's no way that I should have actually been able to take this class next semester. There is not an ounce of doubt in my mind that the reason this is happening is because I'm being watched out for. I don't need it to graduate, I need it to apply for something I'm working on.
• {remember that art history test my last post was about?} I got 100% on the test. After the curve, but still. This doesn't happen. I studied my brains out for that test and I don't think I've ever taken a test where I've remembered the material so easily. Prayers before tests work. 
• I didn't have time to read my chapters of a textbook for a class on wednesday and we have quizzes on them every week. My professor said, "get out a half sheet of paper. Write your name and Halloween quiz on the sheet and pass it up." This for sure should not have happened. I didn't prepare at all and I was still being looked out for. This right here strengthened my testimony even more of making time to read scriptures. at Midnight on tuesday night, I made a decision, partly due to not wanting to read that not fun text book, partly because I was too tired to read it, and partly because I didn't have time for both, to choose to read a few minutes in the Book of Mormon. you guys, read your scriptures. You won't have quizzes if you do. :P
• I took an hour and a half nap. Ask me when the last time this has happened. I don't have time for naps. And I had time this week. If this isn't a Christmas miracle, I do not know what is.
• I got an A on my paper in space exploration. I've been getting C's and D's on everything in that class this semester. 
• My class schedule for next semester fits together like a puzzle. yes I have class from 9am-6:45 with only fifteen minute breaks in between each class on Tuesday and Thursday, but, ask me if I have classes on Monday Wednesday or Friday! In all the semesters of school, Not once have i had a schedule work out perfectly. or even close to perfectly. I got really excited about my schedule for next semester when I looked up classes online that I quite literally blurted out in the photo lab, "The church is true!". {not kidding you} 
• I finally feel like I fit in, in my major. I've finally made friends that I truly and genuinely love and am so grateful for. I felt like a real loner sometimes the last couple years in the department. It's hard for me to explain how much I'd been hoping this would happen. I am so much happier being with other people than I am by myself. I'm kind of boring all by myself.
• I got a calling in my ward. One that I'll actually get to be useful in. Every calling in college I've had I never really could do anything because they were just callings for sake of making sure everyone had one. But, i'm happy to say that I get to teach relief society! Let's be honest, as much as I make fun of the stereotype of YSA relief society lessons, I'm pretty darn sure that I've known my whole life I'm destined to do stuff in relief society. I kind of love being a women in this church. It fits me perfectly. it's the bomb! I feel grateful to have this calling and the opportunity to learn more about the church. 
•  I got to spend a lot of time this week with my best friend, just us. several hours of this was her teaching me for the math placement test, but a few hours were just us talking, painting our nails, and catching up. I have not had any 1 on 1 Betsy time since she got married in July. I don't think she knows how much I needed that this week. She's the all-time best. 
• I got to go to the temple this morning. I'm in love with that place. I can't wait for the day I get to do everything there. 

Well, I'm going to bed. I'll add one more thing I'm grateful for:

I get to sleep in tomorrow. And this is a dream come true. 

Sorry I don't update this thing even a fraction of what I used to. My priorities have had to change a lot lately. It's a good thing.

XOXO